This Mom Thing is Hard

I just kind of want to vent for a quick minute.

I have been sick this past weekend (stuffy nose, headache, sinus crap, sore throat... you name it) and it was horrible. I haven't been sick in a year and a half, so I feel like this cold was just it's way of saying, "Hey! You haven't been sick for a long time so this is what you get." I think I sulked around the apartment all weekend saying to Joel, "This is horrible. I forgot how horrible it is being sick." Not only was I sick, but I still had to take care of little Emma. I miss the days when my mom could take care of me!

All weekend I was trying so hard to not breathe on or touch Emma, because I was so worried about her getting sick too. Of course we wake up bright dark (it is getting darker in the mornings now... boooo) and early this morning and I noticed Emma had a runny nose. #crap

It is hard having a sick baby. I am just glad we both weren't sick at the same time. I have heard over and over again how hard it is having a sick baby, but I couldn't quite comprehend how hard. I've been dreading this day for a long time. Emma sleeps with her pacifier, and if she can't breathe through her nose then she can't breathe or sleep. She has hardly slept at all today, which resulted in her crying in ways I have never seen her cry before, and I cried with her. The whole situation was so sad.

Earlier today I got an email from my sister-in-law asking if we wanted to go to the library with them, and I was way nervous to go with how Emma was feeling... but I needed to get out of the house since I've been here ALL WEEKEND. The library ended up being a lot of fun! Emma could sit up and watch all the kids play, and I think it took our minds off of being sick for a few minutes. I met a lady from Belgium who spoke the most beautiful French I have ever heard! If I meet a friend every time I go to the library, I need to go there more often!!

When we got home I knew Emma hadn't eaten in 5 hours, and she HAD to be hungry. I tried making her dinner and she threw a big fit, which is not like her at all. Anyways, this evening was just hard trying to understand a sick baby. Not knowing what she needed or wanted was so hard mixed in with all the crying. I tried giving her a bath to see if she would like that, and when I got her out she was overly tired and just done for the day which resulted in more crying. Not to mention when I finally calmed her down and almost asleep I went to put her in her crib and I BONKED HER HEAD. I could not have picked a worse time to do so. She cried and cried all over again and puked all over me because she was crying so hard. I felt horrible. Again.

I called my mom bawling and telling her about my hard day. That's what mom's are for, right?? She's been there plenty of times before and understood me perfectly.

Today was just one of those long days. It ended with me finally being able to soothe her and veeeery carefully putting her back to sleep. The love that I felt for her as I nursed her to sleep is unexplainable. I am HER MOM, and the one she wanted. Even though it has been a super duper long day, I wouldn't trade this mom business for anything. Even at 4 in the morning when I am about ready to pass out of exhaustion, she needs to be comforted and my heart is so full of love for this little human it will probably burst.

Now to end this venting session with a couple adorable pictures of Emma, because she is just too cute to not put up more pictures of her ;) Let's hope for a better and more relaxing day tomorrow!

This toy has survived since Joel's older brother was a baby. It is seriously best toy!

Misty mornings and bald babies with mohawks are my favorite