Gratefulness and Blessings

I just got done reading a blog post about The Disease Called "Perfection". It was interesting, and I believe had a good point to it. By the time I was done reading it, I had such a weird feeling... a mixture of gratefulness and also sadness. I felt grateful, realizing all that I have and seeing what other people struggle with (from what the commenters said on the blog)... from over eating, being lazy, not feeling good enough to take care of their kids, and cheating on a spouse... to depression, being over weight, and addictions. I felt so much sadness, realizing how much everyone is going through in the world today attempting to be 'perfect' on the outside. What I have come to realize is that most people that look 'perfect' on the outside, are struggling on the inside.

If you wish to read this blog post, you can read it HERE.

Thinking about this post, and after reading the comments on his blog post.. I have been trying to decide how I feel about it. Like I said, it made me feel grateful and sad. I made the decision to look at the positive side of this and not focus on the negatives, which was what everyone that commented on this post was doing. Sure I could list the negatives that I struggle with on the inside, but that would be terribly depressing!! Thus resulting in me wanting to look at the positives in my life :)

Here is the list of things I have been reflecting on that I am grateful for:
- my healthy marriage
- my husband loves and respects me
- we have never gone hungry
- we are not in debt
- we help eachother up, not push eachother down
- we communicate well
- we have public transportation to get around, so we didn't have pressure of needing a car right away
- we have such a lovely apartment. the guy that lived here before us was a painter, and redid everything
- we are (mainly, we try haha) healthy
- we have a wonderful support system of family and friends on both continents
- THANK GOODNESS FOR AIRPLANES so we can travel back and forth!!!!
- we have plates to eat on, and silverware to eat with
- we both have jobs
- we live in a clean country
- technology.. geez, where would we be without it??
- good friends


Basically, this list can go on and on... hopefully you get the point ;) What are you grateful for?
Happy Sunday everyone!!

What's On My Mind??

ever get that feeling when you want to blog, but have nothing really to say? yup. that is me right about now.  lets see.. where to start.......

- i love our kitty. she is the most idealistic cat you would ever want
- Joel got me some red roses, and i am looooving them
- i love our apartment, it finally feels like a home, and complete
- i love free/cheap things
- Joel is working late. not a fan
- i hate facebook. despise it actually. i am so close to deleting my account
- i love instagram and wish more people used it so i could stalk more people
- i love technology, and that i can call/text my family anytime i want
- i love staying in contact with people
- i get really sad when i get out of touch with people
- i love that my sister is getting married, so we have a good reason to come home
- i miss coldstone
- speaking of ice cream... i ate too much today... BUT IT WAS SOOOO GOOD, OK??
- i want to paint more, and i get sad that i don't
- http://sethadamsmith.com/2012/05/17/the-empty-jar-temple-sealings/
- i love weeding
- every time i need to feel better, i watch Tangled. Joel and i laugh and giggle through it every time
- i wish i was a good photographer
- every time i call my mom, someone calls her and ends our call
- i love living in Gothenburg, but miss the comfort of Utah. a lot.
- Cheetos favorite place to sleep is my underwear drawer. in fact, she is there now. uhhh.......
- i want to go on a bunch of hikes this summer
- my husband is so dedicated to his work, and i am incredibly proud of him
- in the 11.5 months i have lived in Sweden, i can count on one hand how many times i have straightened and curled my hair
- i wish Android had the Vine app
- we leave for Utah in 5.5 weeks. exciting? yes.
- Joel and i LOVE meat, especially bacon

Ok. That's all for now... Bye :)

Hello there long lost friends.

Well, I don't really know where to start haha.

Life has been the busiest it has been in a long time. Not that I don't like it, I just wish I could spend more time with Joel! I guess a good term to call us would be "workaholics". We literally come home from our activities every night and just crash because we are exhausted.

When I first moved to Sweden with no job and nothing to do while Joel was at work, this was my thought process, "Life will only get busier and busier so I need to take advantage of this time now!"

Now that I look back on it, I wish I was busier. I would lay in bed until noon or one because I didn't have anything else better to do. Eventually I would get up, move to the computer, get on the world wide web and rotate between facebook, instagram, and pinterest of course. In my mind I knew I should make the bed, do the dishes, workout/shower, and get the apartment all cute before Joel got home around 5... because I didn't have a job or anything yet, I felt like that was my "job".

Then came study time. I started studying Swedish For Immigrants, or SFI in September. So, from July-September I had nothing to do. Thankfully I started studying Swedish to meet other immigrants and to realize we are all going through the same thing. But. I hated Swedish. Then I didn't want to go to class. I didn't understand a single thing. My teachers would ask me questions in Swedish, and I felt like a deer in the headlights because I didn't know the answer. I kept pushing myself to go.. that was the right thing to do, right?? Sometimes I was lucky to go to class once a week.

THANKFULLY Christmas time came, and saved me. Sure it was dark and cold... This was the time when people would put up lights in their windows. The Christmas spirit was there, AND I had a two week vacation from school. Finally I didn't feel guilty for missing school because it was vacation time :)

I feel like that was the changing time for me, when I started liking Swedish more. That first Monday back to class.. amazing. I sat there in class, and I could understand at least 50% what was going on, versus the 5% before the holidays. Something cool switched in my brain over Christmas break, and I felt 100% better. I have no idea how it happened, but my brain had finally reached the first step of learning a language.

Another thing I have a hard time with... comparing myself to others. Believe it or not, I am really hard on myself on the inside. A whole lot of guilty thoughts like this for example, "They learned Swedish so much faster than me. I wish I studied as much as them. They just got into the class, and already picked up Swedish faster than me." Aaaaand, my negative thoughts haven't made learning Swedish any easier. I still have a hard time in class, knowing how hard learning Swedish has been for me. I feel like when I first arrived in Sweden, a lot of people had high expectations of me. I had people tell me, "Oh! You will learn Swedish in no time." "I bet you will have it down in months!" etc.... Lets just say, it has been a lot harder than I thought!



Well, enough of the vent session and back to being busy. Since I have started working, I go to my SFI class once a week, and I feel great. I enjoy going to class, I LOVE going to work, and I am enjoying life. I have found I like to be busy (to a point of course haha!), unlike what I had imagined in my head when we were first married. Joel has this saying, "If you want something to get done, give it to a busy person." Oh boy, is that true!! When I had nothing to do when we were first married, I hardly got anything done. How weird is that?? You would think I would with all that time on my hands! Funny how it turns out to be the opposite.

Happy Friday everyone :)